As the facilitator, I carefully chose the discussion questions for our small group that day. Choosing to lead by example, I mustered my courage and shared my struggle. Sitting directly across from me, she mouthed, “Me too”. Then she shared her story. And then another shared hers. Seeking connection, we found it that day.
We were created for connection. The God of the universe designed humankind for fellowship with Him and with each other. Connection is built into our DNA. Yet for many of us, we feel disconnected, disjointed, and out of step with the people in our lives. The key to unlocking true engagement and real connection is vulnerability. When we risk being vulnerable, we will be blessed with deeper, more meaningful relationships with God and with each other.
Why do we shy away from meaningful relationships? Why are we willing to settle for less? Perhaps living the mediocre is easier. It takes less emotional energy to stay shallow in our relationships. Are we afraid to be vulnerable? Does the fear of rejection paralyze us in our efforts to connect? We can bravely risk rejection knowing the God of the universe sees us, hears us, and loves us. Just as we are.
Vulnerability is not a word typically used to define strength. The concept is simply counterintuitive. There is, however, tremendous strength in being open with God, ourselves, and others. Vulnerability strips away all pretense. Deep touches deep as we drop the masks. While this may feel uncomfortable, the unexpected blessings are immeasurable.
Sometimes we have to risk being vulnerable first. By dropping our mask and being real, others can feel comfortable doing the same. Opening up to others does not mean that we turn on the fire hydrant of all our woes and gush forth all our deep, dark secrets. Vulnerability demands discretion. Praying for God’s wisdom in knowing how to share with someone and what to share is key. Sometimes is means knowing when to just listen.
Our key verse says “let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds”. When we are in authentic community with one another, we can not only love each other better, we can encourage each other to be the best we can be, to be who God intended us to be. Risking vulnerability to create community forges true relationships and encourages us to use our gifts to serve each other. It spurs us on to do those good works we were created to do. The whole body of believers benefits from being real with each other when we generously use our talents and gifts. In the process, we discover the connection and encouragement we need.
Finding the courage to be vulnerable in relationships unleashes the Holy Spirit to work in our hearts and in the hearts of others. The best example of strength and courage in vulnerability is seen in Jesus’ death on the cross. Jesus, who was fully human and fully God, had the power to circumvent the crucifixion. Instead, He exhibited great strength in restraining His human inclinations. His holy restraint allowed Himself to be vulnerable even unto death. His death, by relinquishing Himself during the crucifixion, made the resurrection and its eternal saving power possible.
Let Jesus be our guide. Risking rejection and stepping out into vulnerability, we, too, can connect with our Savior and with each other in very real and intense ways. We can love and encourage others as they love and encourage us. The strength and power of connection is too good to let it pass us by. Like my small group that day, you will be blessed by profound relationships and connections so intense and powerful you’ll wonder why you waited so long to go deep.
Dear Jesus, thank You for Your example on the cross of being vulnerable, yet strong. Guide me to deeper and more meaningful relationships that encourage me and others and spur us on to do the good works You would have us do. In Your Precious Name, Amen.
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Text and photograph copyright © 2017 by Dawn Dailey. All rights reserved. Photo of Moraine Lake, Banff National Park, Alberta, Canada.
All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The “NIV” and “New International Version” are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™